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Old 10-18-2007, 06:58 AM   #1 (permalink)
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redneck points

I thought of this on my way to work. Since my brother and I have been racking up redneck points, I figure we aught to have a goal. But I think y'all can be included.

100 points for something rednecky
200 points for something only a redneck would do
300+ points proficient acts of redneckdom

-100 for something citified
-200 for something completely citified/gay
-300+ for acts of sophistication and class.

Me:
+1000 for an incident mentioned on another thread
-300 for owning/trading stock
+300 for driving an 85 pickup daily
+200 wearing some kind of camo almost daily, but not having a military job
-200 for computing skills
+400 for having been fired upon by someone who would later become relation.
-100 for spelling proficient and sophistication correctly.

1300

+400 for killing a groundhog and giving it to my neighbor to get in his good graces
+150 for bartering, city people have lost that skill.
+150 for "off roading"

2000

need a while to think of more...
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Old 10-18-2007, 02:29 PM   #2 (permalink)
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do I get points for being to lazy to move trucks when I mow and just shoving the mower under them as far as it will reach?

or for using a brick as my parking brake for the last few months because I'm to lazy/cheap to fix it?
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Old 10-18-2007, 02:49 PM   #3 (permalink)
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do I get points for being to lazy to move trucks when I mow and just shoving the mower under them as far as it will reach?

or for using a brick as my parking brake for the last few months because I'm to lazy/cheap to fix it?
Now did you put a rope on that brick so you can retrieve it with out having to be out of the truck?
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Old 10-18-2007, 03:37 PM   #4 (permalink)
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My college apartment decoration


My college transportation / 83 suburban diesel


my first car / 79 jeep truck with snow plow for extra bling


There are other incriminating photos

- points would be computer and tech skills
+ points would be bad spelling and grammer
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Old 10-18-2007, 04:31 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Now did you put a rope on that brick so you can retrieve it with out having to be out of the truck?
that's not a bad idea, occassionally I forget to retrieve it before jumping in and am unable to retrieve it without falling out

on my 1st car this was no problem, I stored the brick in the back seat then would open my door, drop the brick & pull forward till it hit the tires. When I left I'd just back up a few feet and grab it
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Old 10-18-2007, 04:35 PM   #6 (permalink)
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that's not a bad idea, occassionally I forget to retrieve it before jumping in and am unable to retrieve it without falling out

on my 1st car this was no problem, I stored the brick in the back seat then would open my door, drop the brick & pull forward till it hit the tires. When I left I'd just back up a few feet and grab it
wow, why am i not suprised? lol.
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Old 10-18-2007, 04:50 PM   #7 (permalink)
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at what? my laziness, forgetfullness or redneck engenuity?

your not gonna list all the stuff you get points for?
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Old 10-18-2007, 05:20 PM   #8 (permalink)
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at what? my laziness, forgetfullness or redneck engenuity?

your not gonna list all the stuff you get points for?
how many points do i get for owning a coon dog and using him to hunt?

well, let me see.........

i own a coon dog
coon hunt
got mud flaps girls tattoo'd on my upper back
wear camo in one form or another
i dip/chew
have a confederate flag on the front of my truck

shall i continue? lol.
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You're a fuckin idiot
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Old 10-18-2007, 05:39 PM   #9 (permalink)
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or for using a brick as my parking brake for the last few months because I'm to lazy/cheap to fix it?
I see you and raise you with too lazy to use a brick, I just put it in 4LOW (well, 4.7 low actually).
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Old 10-18-2007, 05:48 PM   #10 (permalink)
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I see you and raise you with too lazy to use a brick, I just put it in 4LOW (well, 4.7 low actually).
Heck I just put it in park.
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Old 10-18-2007, 10:38 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Mines broke too, I just leave it in gear.

You can decide the points on your own, that's why I gave the scale

I got 1000 to start because I met an illegitimate uncle I never knew about, whilst off roading.

some things are so redneck they need that many points.

btw, is that a 79 j10? my brother has an 81.
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Old 10-19-2007, 06:06 AM   #12 (permalink)
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my truck doesn't have enough compression to hold itself on steep hills , I leave it in gear but on inclines it needs some additional help
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Old 10-19-2007, 06:14 AM   #13 (permalink)
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Mines broke too, I just leave it in gear.

You can decide the points on your own, that's why I gave the scale

I got 1000 to start because I met an illegitimate uncle I never knew about, whilst off roading.

some things are so redneck they need that many points.

btw, is that a 79 j10? my brother has an 81.
Yep 79 j-10 with the 360ci v8. That was a fun truck at 16 I miss it a lot but Ohio and snow plowing took its toll on the body and frame.
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Old 10-19-2007, 06:50 AM   #14 (permalink)
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did you see that guys mod for the e-brake? if you look on the NB someone mentioned looping the e-brake cable around and through the firewall, then attached to the brake pedal. You pull the e-brake and it holds your regular brake pedal down. To me it sounded pretty dang smart.

A couple days ago I saw a snapper trying to cross the road so I stopped and grabbed it. It's in a bucket of water at my house now. (+300)

2300 points so far (without digging very deep)

hillbilly gets about 3000 points, 1000 are just for using the handle "hillbilly_young01"

the brick thing is more lazy than anything (have done it myself) it's only worth about 150 points.
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Old 02-05-2008, 07:38 PM   #15 (permalink)
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A couple days ago I saw a snapper trying to cross the road so I stopped and grabbed it. It's in a bucket of water at my house now. (+300)
Now if you use the snapper as a e-brake that would have bin 1000 point. I dont care h your r thats funny!
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lol why would you want to? you already post to yourself
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Old 02-06-2008, 12:11 AM   #16 (permalink)
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Now if you use the snapper as a e-brake that would have bin 1000 point. I dont care h your r thats funny!
What if you make soup with it?
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Old 02-07-2008, 02:53 PM   #17 (permalink)
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Was going to but he was a little small. So we have him in a pond till later.
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Old 02-07-2008, 06:06 PM   #18 (permalink)
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What if you make soup with it?
500
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lol why would you want to? you already post to yourself
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Old 02-07-2008, 06:20 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Thinking about geting ride of that 1/2 of a car in my yard. thats got to be at least 1000
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lol why would you want to? you already post to yourself
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Old 02-08-2008, 06:05 PM   #20 (permalink)
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getting rid of it means you deduct points. As long as it's there that's an easy 1000.
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Old 02-08-2008, 09:40 PM   #21 (permalink)
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my license plate has been held on by zip ties for almost a year.........that has to be good for 500 pts.

I have a after market cd player stacked on top of the stock one which has been hallowed out to hold extra wire.........at least another 500 pts.

my daily driver has 200,000 miles on it and I still owe money on it.........1000 pts
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Old 02-09-2008, 02:55 PM   #22 (permalink)
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Fud, zip ties are a little too nice. My plates are held on to my bumpers by bailing wire, my bumper is being held on by bailing wire, and there's a 1x1 jammed between the battery and the clamp because I put in the cheapest battery I could find. I have been driving around with a roll bar just sitting in the back (the way it would look if it were installed) because I liquid nailed the toolbox in there and am too lazy to wrestle the roll bar out around it. It's a good fit though!

There's more redneck stuff about the truck but I ain't got all day.
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Old 02-09-2008, 03:11 PM   #23 (permalink)
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Hay now I still have the tire swing in the front yard.
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lol why would you want to? you already post to yourself
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Old 02-09-2008, 03:13 PM   #24 (permalink)
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Fud, zip ties are a little too nice. My plates are held on to my bumpers by bailing wire, my bumper is being held on by bailing wire, and there's a 1x1 jammed between the battery and the clamp because I put in the cheapest battery I could find. I have been driving around with a roll bar just sitting in the back (the way it would look if it were installed) because I liquid nailed the toolbox in there and am too lazy to wrestle the roll bar out around it. It's a good fit though!

There's more redneck stuff about the truck but I ain't got all day.
Nice thats what I would do but the bumper has too be a 2x6
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lol why would you want to? you already post to yourself
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Old 02-11-2008, 12:04 PM   #25 (permalink)
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500
what if you use it for bait?? am i more or less of a redneck if i woulda ran it over??....cuz that's prolly what i'd have done. i'm not totally mean tho...i have a "no pets" policy on roadkills.
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Old 02-11-2008, 07:50 PM   #26 (permalink)
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Nice thats what I would do but the bumper has too be a 2x6
What if you use a piece of railroad track for a bumper????

Damn I found the post, but the pic is gone....the guy had an old beat up Chevy I think it was, with a piece of steel railroad track for his bumper. Of course it has something like bailing wire holding it on.....WAY redneck.....
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Old 02-12-2008, 04:36 PM   #27 (permalink)
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what if you use it for bait?? am i more or less of a redneck if i woulda ran it over??....cuz that's prolly what i'd have done. i'm not totally mean tho...i have a "no pets" policy on roadkills.
It depends on what you are fishing for?
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lol why would you want to? you already post to yourself
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Old 02-12-2008, 08:19 PM   #28 (permalink)
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how many points for this??

saturday I am helping my friend plow snow.........we are useing his 86 3/4 ton chevy........it is your typical 700$ rusted out plow truck complete with a piece of 8" c-channel for a bumper.........it is powered by a bored and stroked small block pushing in the neighborhood of 300 hp........we built the motor a couple years ago cause the stock engine blew up and he had all the parts to build this one in the garage......so he decided why not use it.

anyhow we are plowing along when all of the sudden we here belt noise followed by a loud bang.........we get out open the hood and discover the the bolt holding the harmonic balancer to the crank broke, the keyway then sheered and the balancer is now laying on the ground under the truck......oops

so we start looking into options to fix it.
1. put in new crank and balancer.........more money than truck is worth and it is f'ing cold out side to be tearing down an engine.
2. find another motor since sbc's are super plentiful........cheaper and more viable but it is still too cold for an engine swap.

so what do we do...........option 3. get out the welder......line up the keyway and weld the balancer directly to the crank.

we figured both were junk at this point anyhow plus it was the easiest and required the least amount of time out in the cold
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Old 02-13-2008, 01:25 PM   #29 (permalink)
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not bad i think that will work for 1000
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Old 02-13-2008, 07:35 PM   #30 (permalink)
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1000 easily. That and a welded diff are pretty redneck things to do.
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